Pet Psychic

I invited a pet psychic over today to get a reading on my dog. What an interesting experience that was. She sat down in my living room while I held D'Ogee on my lap, and for an hour and a half she relayed his thoughts to me. A lot of it rang true to me. Some of it I questioned, but according to the psychic my dog has a lot to say; the little jabber box. Here's what was on his mind today:

1. One of the first things he said was that he is getting much better food from me than he was with his previous owners. He has some stomach issues, but he feels better with the food I give him. I knew it would make a difference to give him quality food.
2. I'm supposed to give him a tablespoon of plain yogurt everyday to help his tummy.
3. He wants his toenails painted.
4. He's proud of himself for being a good watch dog. I need to tell him thank you when he's barking at people instead of hushing him. Then he'll be quiet. He likes to be acknowledged.
5. He's also proud of himself because he's so funny. He knows he makes me laugh all the time. He doesn't think the cat is very funny, though.
6. He's not jealous of the cat because he knows dogs are better than cats anyway.
7. He's trying to figure out a way to get the cat to play with him, but she isn't about to play.
8. He wants me to get another little dog so he can have a girlfriend that can be his pet.
9. He likes being my baby. He says it's ok to put clothes on him because then everyone says how cute he is. He wants a cowboy outfit. He doesn't want me to have any human babies because he wants to be the baby.
10. He must have seen someone fishing somewhere because he wants to see more of that. He wants to catch a fish. He also wants to bite a squirrel. He'd really like me to get a bowl of little fish and put it on the floor so he can look at it.
11. He worries about my health because he wants me to live a long time. He thinks I need to eat more protein and I need to take something for my stomach problems.
12. He loves the color of my hair. He thinks I'm very pretty.
13. He's worried about me leaving on a big trip somewhere (Costa Rica) because he's afraid of where he'll be left. I'm planning on leaving him with my mom on the farm. The psychic said he really likes my mom, but he's afraid she'll make him stay outside a lot and he's afraid of some big dogs around there. Mom and Dad don't have any other dogs, so I'm not sure what she's talking about. Maybe he's confusing the dogs for the cows!
14. His first owners were an older couple and he misses them sometimes, but he loves living with me and knows this is where he should be. He feels like his job is to help me mentally and emotionally and to protect me.
15. She sees me helping a whole bunch of children; maybe through dog therapy. I think I'll look into that. It sounds very fulfilling.
17. He says I'm a very good mom. He loves me very much.

OK, so with a dog like that, who needs a man? :)